When the adults chase refs to the locker room

What's the worst thing you've ever seen happen to a ref or umpire at a youth sports game?

I heard some doozeys recently while working on this article for the New York Times.

A football official in Oregon told me about being chased from the field to the locker room after a game, then having adults pounding on the door trying to get in.

A basketball ref, also in Oregon, recalled being doused with a large cup of soda.

A basketball official in Ohio remembered working a rec league game last season in which the parents on the losing side took umbrage at a couple of close calls. A disturbing chant began building on their side of the court: Virginia Tech, Virginia Tech.

The consequence of all this is that lots of qualified officials are heading for the exits. As the story explains, shortages of umps and refs in volleyball, football, soccer, among others, have cropped up in many parts of the country. In multiple surveys, when officials are asked why they're quitting, they cite fans and coaches who give them a rough time. Too much of a hassle, they say, for 40 bucks or whatever the going rate might be.

When people talk about the damage that's done when adults get out of hand at kids' sports games, this isn't the first thing that comes to mind. But ask the folks who're searching for officials. It's a problem.

We're the worst behaved sports parents on Earth!

We're Number One! We're Number One!

It's official. A recent survey of sports parents worldwide concludes that the worst behaved adults on Earth are...us.

Reuters/Ipsos polled 23,000 adults in 22 countries for observations about parental behavior. Its findings: "People living in the United States (60 percent) were most likely to witness unsavory behavior by a parent followed closely by residents of India (59 percent), Italy (55 percent), Argentina (54 percent), Canada (53 percent) and Australia (50 percent). But people in Hungary, the Czech Republic, Mexico, Japan and France were the least likely to see parents behaving badly while their children played sports."

Here's the complete list (as posted by the Josephson Institute)

United States (60%)
India (59%)
Italy (55%)
Argentina (54%)
Canada (53%)
Australia (50%)
Spain (42%)
Belgium (39%)
Great Britain (37%)
Sweden (35%)
Germany (35%)
South Korea (34%)
Poland (32%)
China (31%)
Brazil (31%)
Russia (30%)
Netherlands (28%)
France (26%)
Japan (25%)
Mexico (25%)
Czech Republic (24%)
Hungary (16%)

The legend of the Magic Hockey Helmet

If anyone is thinking we're due for some uplifting news in this space, point taken. Today's posting is such a story.

Miller Donnelly is 12. When he was nine, he penned a speech to deliver to his school class. A few months later, his father taped the speech - dubbed, "The Magic Hockey Helmet" - and posted it on YouTube so his uncle could watch. (Thus, the reference to "Uncle Mike").

Through a series of events, mostly serendipitous, "The Magic Hockey Helmet" has gotten considerable attention throughout Canada, played at arenas before games, been linked to by several hundred Web sites. On YouTube, it's at 284,000 views.

This is Miller's clever way of telling us we're squeezing the fun out of sports.

Footnote: You can tell the Donnellys didn't expect this to attract a global audience - the video was shot in the basement of their home in Ontario, with Miller in his pajamas.

Sportsmanship at an all-time low - or maybe not

It's Professor YouthSportsParents. This fall, I'm teaching a graduate seminar on youth sports and society at McDaniel College outside Baltimore. Tonight's topic: parents, coaches and sportsmanship.

We'll speak with Washington Post reporter Annie Gowen, who wrote this interesting piece about a group of Maryland soccer moms and dads banished from the sidelines for conduct unbecoming a grownup in corduroy slacks - or some like infraction. What I found particularly fascinating was the league's take-no-prisoners attitude about the adults' behavior. In essence, do the crime, serve the time.

Students have been doing their own research, looking into local leagues and associations, speaking with officials, evaluating codes of conduct. They'll share what they've learned about differing approaches to the sportsmanship question.

One issue I'll be raising: Is sideline etiquette at youth sports games truly in decline? The pat - and perhaps even accurate - answer is, of course. This survey underscores the point. The Awards and Recognition Association asked people whether sportsmanship is worse now than when they were growing up. Sixty-three percent said yes. Among folks 60 and older, 81 per cent thought sportsmanship had suffered since their kid sports playing days.

Still, that's hardly conclusive. Could it be that we simply hear more about rude, overbearing sports parents than we did in years past, thanks to CNN, ESPN and niche blogs like this one? That while our behavior at youth sports games can be rude, even loutish, we were just as rude and loutish in the old days? I don't know. And, more important, I doubt anyone truly does.

Cal Ripken Jr: "Return the game to the kids."

Another name - Cal Ripken Jr. - to add to our honor roll of pro athletes who speak out about over-the-top parents. Note the caution about cheering too much. It's a point well taken. As adults, we're doing the most at a sports game when we're doing the least.

Sportsmanship alive in Wisconsin (and Illinois)

Too often in this space we're writing about the decline of sportsmanship. This story from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel and, later, USA Today's Prep Rally balances the scales. A remarkable story that occurred during a high school basketball game in Wisconsin.

Sportsmanship and J.P. Hayes

Here's my latest post from BusinessWeek's "Working Parents." I'm writing about golfer J.P. Hayes and the stellar example he sets for young athletes.

Notre Dame, snowballs, sportsmanship

Unfortunate scene at the Notre Dame-Syracuse football game this weekend at South Bend. As ND was going down to a startling defeat, a group of restless, ridiculous students on the home side of the stadium pelted Notre Dame players with snowballs.

This from an AP report:

"Defensive lineman Ian Williams got hit in the helmet, defensive end Ethan Johnson was struck on the left cheek and a St. Joseph County police officer on the sideline looking into the crowd got hit in the chest. An NBC camera man also was a frequent target and several snowballs reached the field, although none landed near where play was occurring.

"When the Irish defense held a meeting on the sideline, injured linebacker Brian Smith stood on a bench to try to shield his teammates. But when a snowball hit defensive tackle Pat Kuntz, he stood and faced the crowd and appeared to challenge whoever threw it to come down on the field. At least one fan was seen being led away by police."

There's a teaching moment here for the unruly fans involved. And by extension, those of us who sometimes get carried away at youth sports games. (By way of example, here is the lead paragraph from a recent story in the Beaumont (Texas) Enterprise: "A still-unidentified Lumberton coach will not face criminal charges in connection with an assault on a Bridge City coach during a Pee Wee football game.")

Sports for kids aren't about us, our expectations and our dreams. When we lose sight of that, bad things often follow.

Or, as Knute Rockne, who was casually acquainted with Notre Dame football, put it: "One man practicing sportsmanship is better than a hundred teaching it."

"You make me sick!"

A clever, direct and disturbing message to overly invested adults. Little League Baseball deserves much credit for coming up with this one, which apparently is reaching a large audience. Last time I checked Youtube - more than 540,000 views.

Rule one: It's not about the adults

This is a wise column from Tim Warsinskey, veteran high school sports writer for the Cleveland Plain Dealer. After covering prep games for 21 years, he offers parents 10 rules to live by, all worth considering.

I particularly echo rules 6 and 8.

Q and A

I was interviewed last week by Dustin Watson of Gatehouse News Service. Dustin asked a series of thoughtful questions about youth sports and the proper role for parents. I did my best to reply thoughtfully. The article appeared in a dozen or so Gatehouse newspapers.

In the article, I'm referred to as an "expert in the field." Ok, I'll take it. I'm a journalist who has spent the last few years exploring these issues with parents, coaches, doctors, professional athletes and more. And a dad who has made mistakes finding my place in the sports lives of my own two sons.

You'll find Dustin's piece here.